The Help tells a true story…even if it’s not yours

I’m on my annual vacation in Martha’s Vineyard, a place that serves as somewhat of a racial utopia in America. Somewhat. It’s a place where blacks and whites of all ages mix and mingle as neighbors, then retire to the homes that have been in their families for generations — on opposite sides of the island.

Black vineyarders are either the products of old money (translation: a family of doctors/lawyers/accountants from about 3 generations — yes, that’s “old” money for African Americans) or new Wall Street money. So it’s a sharp reminder of how far some of us have come as a people. Yet there are still so many black Americans who struggle financially. I guarantee that those vineyarders have a second cousin on welfare or in prison. Martha’s Vineyard is where they come to forget that reality.

But nearly all of us — black vineyarders and welfare recipients alike — have common roots as servants. What I’ve heard recently is a lot of passion and fervor around what the servant experience was/is like. Black intelligencia (or “blacksperts” as I like to call them) have decided that the servant experience portrayed in The Help is not the true black servant experience. It seems that only angry maids who secretly plot to kill their employers are an acceptable portrayal. Apparently, all servant experiences were and are the same.

Unlike the blacksperts, I actually read and enjoyed The Help. Was it sanitized? A bit. Was it a one-sided portrayal of the black experience? Yes — it’s a slice of life, and it’s not the maids’ story. Were the characters apolitical? Yes — as were my grandmother and aunts and other relatives. Did they love the little white kids they raised? Yes — as do the black nannies I come into contact with today who care for my white friends’ kids.

My annoyance about The Help debate is that it’s so obvious that the blacksperts did not read the book. So their understanding of it is inaccurate. Additionally, they discount the experience of the scores of black women who went to work for white families everyday not bc they wanted to, but because it was the only job they could get. And despite their best efforts, their big hearts wouldn’t allow them to let the hatefulness of their employers taint the care they gave to their still-innocent charges.

So, for those who have not read The Help but wish to spew your vehement hatred on the experience that you claim is inaccurate — the experience that my 85 year old grandmother says is the experience of her and her friends — here’s what the book is about:

– A white girl recently graduated from Old Miss but can’t get the job of her choice bc she’s a woman and should be more concerned with finding a husband.
– This girl becomes a bit enlightened when she sees how her family and friends have not progressed while she was off getting educated. Yet she doesn’t do anything to change the situation. (So far, pretty realistic, yes?)
– She lands a job writing a domestic column but knows nothing of it, so she gets help from her family’s maid.
– Seeking a better writing career, she selfishly gets the maid and the maid’s friends to agree to the dangerous role of allowing her to ghost write their stories. This is something the liberals in NYC would be willing to publish.

Notice that each point is about Skeeter, the main character. So no, the author did not write a book about maids. She wrote a coming-of-age story about a young college grad coming to terms about who she really is and the maids who help her learn through their experiences. That’s it. It’s not revolutionary. It’s not a book about maids who love their white families or love to clean houses. It’s about a girl who develops two unlikely — not to mention, unwilling — mentors.

Earlier tonight, I went on a bit of a twitter rant about this. In case you missed it, here’s the summary:

“Annoyed by all the so-called yet sub-par writers who bash The Help w/o reading it. It’s not our story. It’s one young [white] girl’s story. And I’m not saying you must read something before you make an opinion about it. I saw a couple of T. Perry’s plays/movies before deciding to never give him another dime of my money. But to have such vehement and certain hate for something they’ve obviously not read is odd to me. And coming from ppl who haven’t honed their own craft – however commercially successful – well, that actually makes it kinda comical. Anywho, I read the book with my 85 yo grandmother and, despite what non-reading “blacksperts” say, it actually WAS quite representative of her experience. You see, just as we want white folks to acknowledge, we’re not all the same. Our experiences vary. And the secondary story in The Help – that of the black maids – tells someone’s story. Even it it’s not yours.”

That’s really all I have to say about the matter for now…at least until the “I’m so angry Viola Davis won an Oscar for playing a maid” backlash begins. Until then, go see the movie or don’t. Talk about how much you love it or hate it. But do us mere mortals a favor and reserve the vitriol for things that warrant your blackspertice.

Thanks for listening.